Sex in die Stadt

 From our Schnitzelbahn guest-blogger, BB:

   

IS MODESTY DEAD?

Perhaps it is only dying. Nevertheless, our European cousins have a different take on this matter which is pervasive throughout human history. Where is the line between flirtatious, provocative, art, practical, decadent? Greek and Roman baths, well, chronicles and poems suggest that maybe a little more than bathing was going on! And the Victorians? They didn’t bathe at all but some of the best bodice-rippers were written in the era. Sex appears to always have been a subject for scandalous behavior among royalty and our leaders and politicians and the chic of today have honed the art.

So a lighthearted seasonal firsthand look at modesty – (literally)

While reading on a quiet shaded bench in Munich’s English Garden beside one of the Isar’s meandering canals, a group of 20 something back packers  stopped their trek and disrobed and jumped in the water, soaped up, splashed a little and squealed a bit for the cold water and proceeded to lay out au natural in the rays. My college days were missing this experience.  But I have to say, it seemed quite normal to them, oblivious to each other‘s bodies and me and other park strollers. Ok, I enjoyed the show.

Skimpy Ladies’ fashion season. De rigueur is the short skirt or shorts topped off by a clingy stretch fabric Tee, two sizes too small over a push up pink or purple bra! Is it Britney, Miley, Lady Gaga influence? (Pardon the pun but my male American colleagues are Gaga). So is the fashion inspired by the desire to be “cool” or just cool? The biggest tip off of the American tourist are the gawkers, puberty to geezer. Europeans stroll by looking at maps, buildings and always on their cell phones.

Let’s not forget the clothes optional\nude beaches. These are not girls gone wild beaches. They are a mix of sun worshipers who mostly should be wearing clothes.  Particularly the guys and will someone explain how Speedo remains profitable?? To each his own, it’s a nice idea but thank God for mirrors.

I happened to be a guest at a world famous Spa in Baden Baden. It’s nestled in the hills deep in the Black Forest in a convenient location to the Germans, French and Swiss not known for their prudishness.  Well there were a few American rich there too. The scene is a gorgeous indoor\outdoor infinity edge pool. Incredibly elegant tropical motif inside and a stunning view outside of a seasonal color fest fringed with the first dusting of snow. I counted 32 people in chaises and a few at the pool dangling their toes. All are chatting, reading newspapers, magazines, kindles or laptops. So in walks real life Barbie herself from an adjacent massage cubicle clad in a short terry cloth robe and Sarah Jessica spikes.  She walks to a chaise, drops the robe, slips out of the heels and proceeds to wade into the pool from the infinity edge wearing nothing but a thong that would make a Brazilian blush. Newspapers fold up, magazines close, a Kindle is dropped, and a laptop closes. Interestingly it is the Americans who so act as the Europeans seemingly have no reaction. In the spirit of honesty and transparency, I closed my magazine.

Ah winter! Skiing, hot tubs, saunas and après ski.  I am with several couples in various stages of relationship at the Austrian resort, Zell am See and the plan is to meet at the hot tub after skiing. The ladies are clad in rather conservative bikinis and the men, thank God, in normal trunks. After a few beers (plastic cups) and the usual lies the suggestion is made that we do the sauna. We enter a room where a small sign reminds us that one must disrobe and there is a fresh stack of clean towels. No one but me is in any way concerned. Two ladies wrap a towel around their waist. The rest of the guys and gals just throw one over their shoulder. Uuh, except me, I’m wrapped and holding it with two hands! So I diligently tried to follow the rule about eye contact. But I peeked. My towel was sort of loosely in my lap as I wanted to look uninhibited.  Actually to my delight the showers were separate but back to the same unisex dressing room!

So on to après ski. I had to bring it up, "Are you guys comfortable with the sauna scene?" The looks I got were as if I had asked if Mother Theresa dated Hugh Hefner. One gal unleashed on me, “That’s the trouble with you Americans; you can’t separate the body and nudity from sex!”

So in the end, I’m confused, mystified. She has a point. Nude art is all over the Vatican. It’s even in American museums. Even Mary had breasts and Jesus had a penis. So what exactly is it. Is it just cultural; are we guilt ridden due to religious teaching? Do we make too much of a big deal about it? I guess I’m in the middle. I’m comfortable around handsome and pretty nudes…. As long as my clothes are on or I can control my towel!