Choice: Less Is More

An expat's trip to the US is rarely a holiday or an opportunity to see somewhere new. It usually consists of (1) Visiting family and friends, and (2) shopping.

Each time I go home, my list of must-haves is smaller and smaller. In some cases, I've found reasonable substitutes here; in others, I've decided I just don't care so much anymore. Upon arriving home from 2 weeks in NY, I exclaimed to Herr J "But my bags were 8 kg below the limit...I could have fit so much more!" I guess this is a good sign...I've been working to deplete the stocks in my closet and I've realized there are only a few things I need from home.

Still on the list...

But what always strikes me is the sheer number of varieties of the same product. And I think it's gotten worse.

I have sensory overload when I go to CVS or Wallgreens (don't even get me started on Target!!). I just stand at the shelves with no idea what to buy because there are 28 different choices for each product, and I'm usually just thankful to find one of something where I understand what the product is! Now there are about 10 different varieties of Sudafed, plus an equal number of the store brand and 5 variations on how many pills in the box. Yet, they're pretty much the same - the good stuff behind the counter, or the weaker stuff on the shelf. Luckily I got to CVS an hour before closing.... I wanted to buy the classic St. Ive's Apricot Scrub, but now there are different formulations of it, plus the store brand. While of course I want to make my own decisions, I now see the space that advertising and magazines fill in trying to convince me what to buy!! If the marketing people weren't out there telling me how their product is differentiated from the others, how would I know what to buy?

The choice is just too much for me sometimes. And I'm realizing that a lot of things in life are like this.

For example, I've taken quite a few trips in the past month, and while I feel each time the packing is better, I still end up having packed things I never wear on a trip, and it's still a decision what to wear in the morning. I'm a pretty careful packer....I had a carryon and a half-empty small checked bag for a 2 week business trip. But still I had too much.

Our trip to Finland was an interesting experiment...Given that the temperature was mostly below freezing and the activities outdoors, the lodge provided clothing. Socks, boots, gloves, fleece, coats, hats - everything! All I packed for a 10 day trip was a couple of pairs of black leggings, 4 tops, underwear, a couple pairs of socks, a sweater, the boots I wore, and some warm long underwear. There was plenty of room left in my carry-on sized bag! The amazing thing was that I ended up with one shirt unworn. But even more amazing - getting dressed was so simple! With such a small range to choose from, life was much simpler.

A passage from Olivia Goldsmith's Fashionably Late struck me as quite true on many levels (including the impossible mission of returning anything in Europe!):

Karen had forumlated a few theories about why it was so hard for women to look comfortable and stylish. American women didn't know how to dress partly because they had too much. She remembered a French woman who had once visited Belle. Chic, elegant, and a Parisian attorney's wife, the woman had looked in Belle's closet with horror and asked: "But how can you dress well? You have too much to choose from!" As the brilliant shoe designer Manolo Blahnik had said, "It's all a question of selection, to choose less. That is something Americans do not understand. They think more is better."
Karen had observed that French women, even the middle-class ones, wore expensive clothes, but they had far fewer things than Americans and formulated their ensembles much more carefully. Of course, they learned the hard way not to make mistakes: it was next to impossible to return merchandise in Paris. Can you imagine the attitude?

The same happens here. It's changing with the advent of all the "disposable fashion" of H&M, Forever 21, and similar stores carrying low priced, trendy clothes. But in general, many Germans invest in a relatively small amount of quality clothing that will be wearable for many years. The German style is a little more classic (sometimes described as "boring") than the French (more feminine) or Italian (much more fitted, and on the flashier end of still being classic styling), but the attitude toward purchases is similar.

Even before this, I admit I have too much stuff. I have a bad habit of not wanting to throw out anything that is still functionable or wearable....though my definitions may be a bit skewed.... Also, I have almost 15 years of clothes suited to hot climates and driving everywhere. So realistically most of my clothes and almost ALL of my shoes were unsuitable for life in a cobblestoned city that has a long winter!

I've been trying to cut down and to also get rid of things that I don't or shouldn't wear. And to remember that when I replace something, I need to actually throw out the old one! I employed a new strategy during my trip to New York...I packed things that I really needed to throw out, and then I threw them out after wearing them. Socks with no elastic and small holes, too big underwear, and hair brushes that I had replaced because they were worn out (but still worked passably...). And throwing them out at the end cleared the way for chocolate chips and other goodies!

Comments

[cliff1976]

We're headed to Mexico in a week and the U.S. about a month after that. I think the only things on the radar at the moment are

-- white gym socks
-- a can of baking powder
-- a bottle of vanilla extract

...all of which could be had from Costco in Mexico or the U.S. This is what happens when you live in Europe for over seven years. Oh, and the reason chocolate chips aren't on our list is because a kind soul recently restocked us after visiting the U.S. Another sign of Eurofication: they don't taste very good straight out of the bag any more. :-(

[Frau A]

Definitely get the vanilla in Mexico - Mexican vanilla extract is quite good!

(vanilla and baking powder are usually on my list too, though am stocked up from Christmas)
Luckily the Asian store has the soft brown sugar, so I don't have to lug that back!

Have a great trip!

[Astrid]

I can totally relate when it comes to wanting things from your home country, only for me it's the other way round, since I live in the U.S.
Nutella used to be at the top of my list, but now it can be easily found in every grocery store, as well as at drugstores. The fact that there are also coupons available for $1 off a jar makes it even sweeter.

German ( or Swiss ) chocolate is another one. There is no better chocolate ( in my opinion ) than Milka or Lindt. Both of these brands are now also on sale here.
I still can't get myself to like the regular Hershey's chocolate as much as Milka, but Hershey's Bliss and Dove chocolate are great!

My family and friends laugh at me when they see or hear what I miss from Germany.
Miracoli. Really? Yes, really. I grew up with that, and the sauce is so good!

Muesli. Langnese honey ( can be found here, too, but is super expensive ). Christmas goodies like Dominosteine, Spekulatius, Lebkuchen etc.

But as more and more european food becomes available here, the less important it is to me.

What I miss more and more, though, ( besides family and friends ), are traditions and just everyday things.
Christindlesmarkt. Strassencafes. In die Stadt gehen. Non-chain restaurants. Kirchweih.

The list goes on.

And don't get me started on packing.
Last year I thought I was being smart when I decided to mail a package to Germany before I left on my trip. The plan was to avoid paying the $50 each way for a 2nd checked suitcase. It ended up that the postage for the package cost me almost $150.
More than what the suitcase would have cost me. And I could have put sooo much more into a suitcase.
Oh well. I'll remember for this year's trip!

Thanks for your wonderful, insightful and entertaining blog!

[emily]

Even though the chocolate here is fantastic the chocolate bits still aren't the same as chocolate chips. I also stock up on those.

Did you see this clothing swap that will take place May 22? We'll be out of town, but it might be something you'd like to check out.
http://www.swapinthecity.com/en/index.php

[Frau A]

Thanks, Emily - I just saw it yesterday and it looks fun. Hopefully will get some people together to try it out. Luckily I've never found a clothing donation box when I was looking for it (but stumble across them at odd time), so have some things ready!